Starlings

In the 1890s a group of
Shakespeare enthusiasts
decided America should
have all the birds that 
Shakespeare ever mentioned.

In this endeavor they
released 100 European Starlings
in New York’s Central Park.
It was a mistake.

Whenever we hang a cake
of bird suet out on our
bird feeder Starlings fly in 
to devour it.

As soon as they’ve pecked
it to pieces, they disappear.
Only to return when we put
out the next suet supply. 

Other birds don’t have a
chance because they can’t 
match the aggression and
bad manners of the Starlings.

The Starlings remind me
of some of the members of
our state legislature. Hang
before them a piece of 
legislation that will expand
health insurance for the poor,
and they will peck it
to pieces.

Regrettably some Starlings 
live a long time. One banded
male lived more than 15 years—
no doubt pecking a ton
of suet during his lifetime.

We shall hope that the 
tenure of the pecking 
legislators is far, far shorter
than the lifespan of the
Starling.